Category Archives: How To Tell If You Are Italian

How to tell if you are Italian

Posted on by January 31, 2018

Do you know how to tell if you are Italian? If not, check out this articleFeatured below is a whimsical list of “How to tell if You are Italian”

  1. You have many relatives named either Joe or Vito
  2. When you were growing up, you had five cousins all living on the same street
  3. You grew up in a small house, but you still had two kitchens and one was in the basement
  4. If someone in your family grows beyond 6’ 2”, it’s presumed that the mother had an affair
  5. Your spouse wears a tee shirt that says “Pray for me, I married an Italian”
  6. There were at least 28 people in your wedding party
  7. Your grandfather had a fig tree
  8. You’ve always wanted a red Ferrari
  9. When you were growing up, you ate Sunday dinner at 2pm
  10. Your big family gatherings were held in your basement
  11. Your favorite movie is the “Godfather” and you watch it every time it’s on TV
  12. When you were growing up, you thought Jesus was an Italian who lived in Israel
  13. You refer to red “sauce” as “gravy”
  14. You’ve been hit with a spoon and/or you’ve been hit by a nun
  15. On Easter or Christmas your family’s first course was ravioli or tortellini
  16. Your mom’s meatballs are the best
  17. When you were growing up, you thought that all wine was red and it only came in gallon jugs
  18. You’ve been to the Vatican at least once
  19. For a short time while you were growing up, you wanted to be a priest or a nun
  20. Your favorite singers are (in order) Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Jerry Vale, and Louis Prima
  21. At least one person in your family does a great impression of Don Corleone
  22. You know all the words to “That’s Amore”
  23. On Thanksgiving your family’s first course was lasagna
  24. You feel strangely comfortable when you sit on plastic-covered furniture
  25. You referred to vinegar and oil as “regular” dressing

If at least five of the above apply to you, congratulations – You’re Italian!

This list was all in good fun so I hope you enjoyed it!

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How to tell if you are Italian